If your boyfriend really cares about you, he will care about your health and comfort. He will put this ahead of his own desire for a different sex experience. You should be able to express your desires and have your needs met. Anything that is not mutually desirous is not a good idea in a relationship. If you can't reach agreement on sexual activity this should be an indicator of the type of relationship you have. It is a red flag to me. I would seriously reconsider if you can't work through this and have a satisfactory result without pain, swelling or bleeding on your part. I consider that unacceptable.
Good luck and best wishes.
The answers in online forums are for information only and are not intended to substitute for medical advice and care. Please see your personal health care provider for further evaluation of your individual case.
Debbie Miller, RN