help with self mutilation and depression

[kstar1122]

i never actually learnd how to cope with anykind of emotions. the next best thing for me has been to hurt myself. i don't kno why, its just what i have always done. whether it be to hit something until my knuckles bleed, or to cut. i have been to a therapist, and commited to a hospital. neither have helpd.
to anyone on the outside, i would look like the happiest person in world.
i laugh as much as possible, smile at wrk and home. joke around with my friends.
but its all just a mask, wall, ya kno, that type of thing.
as soon as my door closes to my room and im alone, all of my demons come out.
i let all of my pain and anger build up, and now i am numb from it. empty.
i have burn and slash scars covering my left forarm/wrist completly. i stoppd when my parents found out and gave me a "good talking to"
so i moved to my stomach.
i was prescibed 20mg generic prozac, i forget what its calld, it startd with a F.
i took them for a month or two before i gave up. i didnt feel any different
i kno it takes time but i just rly think that it was not enough of a dose.
my parents ognore my depression just like i do. they will never understand the depth of it and how much pain i am in.
&that is my fault bc i do nothing but spend my days hiding it as best as i can.
i cant say this to them so i will say it here.
i need help.
ive tried to ask b4 but i always hold back. when it comes to actually sitting down with someone and talking about it, i got nothing.
i just need to kno how to ask for help. andwhat kind of help i need.
please and thank you :)

[Dr. Rashmi Ojha]

Hi kstar1122,
I have few suggestions for you at this time. The generic Prozac (Fluoxetine) that you have taken in the past infact can take upto 8 wks before you see any difference and if you donot notice any significant difference, then the doctors decide whether you need adjustment in the dosage or switch to the other one.

Regarding self-mutilating behavior, have you ever been through Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT)? It was developed at University of Washington and was found to be very helpful in people with self-mutilating behavior like yours. There are therapists trained in DBT in most cities and you can discuss this with your Therapist.

There are few workbooks available in market. I have heard of people trying such workbooks and one of them is "Understanding Self-Injury: A Workbook for Adults." You can consider using it.

And I recommend following up regularly with your Psychiatrist/Therapist.