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- Mon Oct 22, 2007 1:52 pm
I am a 28 yr girl from London.
For years since I was very young I always suffered from depression , but sometimes wonder if thats what it really is, you see I do feel depressed so much that I feel suicidal sometimes, I cry alot and just wish I wasnt here. But there are other things happening to me that is worrying, the only way I can descibe it is terrible mood swings. One minute I am fine and the next minute I can have these terrible rages. I find life very difficult, I don't like my job, I feel very supressed in life, which is sometimes why I think I have these outburst. I am very good at hiding it from people like at work they only people who see this side of me are people like my boyfriend or my mum.
I wondered if I was bipolar but even though I have terrible depressive episodes and these rages I don't ever feel over elated or extremely excitable.
I have been to my doctors several times andfor about 2 years was on effexor, but even though it calmed my mind, I couldnt take the side effects. I don't really want to go back on anti depressents.
I also suffer from PCOS, which I wonder if contributes to my problems, I recently came off Metformin which didnt really help and am now on Dianette to try and regulate my periods and help my severe acne.
i also have a history of self harm and took an overdose about 3 months ago.
I am sorry this all sounds mixed up but I find it hard to describe how I feel.
| Debbie Miller, RN
- Thu Oct 25, 2007 4:16 pm
What you are experiencing should be evaluated by a psychiatrist so you can get an accurate and current diagnosis. Sometimes what starts out as depression is later discovered to be bipolar and there are two types of bipolar disorder so your symptoms may be more consistent with type II than with type I for instance.
Do get an appointment soon because getting on the right treatment plan can make all the difference for your quality of life. Yet, it can take time to get meds regulated and to determine the right diagnosis, so once in treatment, be patient for results.
If you feel you might harm yourself, please call for emergency help. Realize that it is not you talking, but that you may be coming from a place that is controlled by chemicals which may be out of balance. When this happens, you need help from someone who can see beyond where you are at that time. Once the chemicals are in balance, you will feel better and life will be worth living.
Good luck with this.