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Forum Name: Psychiatric Topics

Question: Still a virgin - sexual anxiety


 bmb26 - Thu Sep 18, 2008 12:53 pm

Hi,

Im not sure where to really begin, I do get erections but mostly when viewing/reading fetish materials. I've avoided these materials for a while now and I haven't noticed an improvement if you will.

I was also reading about Schizoid Personality Disorder and felt that some of those symptoms ring true with me. These symptoms are as follows: Limited capacity to express either positive or negative emotions towards others. Very few (if any) close friends or relationships, and a lack of desire for such. Indifference to either praise or criticism. Although I do have a lot more friends now than I did 3-4 years ago. Indifference to social norms and conventions. And finally, Preoccupation with fantasy and introspection.

Having said all that I am a Virgin, and now that I am attending University, I want to try exploring sex. Some of my room mates, who aren't aware of my situation, have agreed to hook me up with some girls. While i'm extremely excited i'm also almost dreading it for the reasons mentioned above. I really do want to have sex, however my anxiety is probably working against me.

Thanks!
 Dr. E. Seigle - Thu Oct 23, 2008 4:44 pm

Hi bmb26,

It sounds as if you have some anxiety regarding your social relationships and your sexual performance. This usually relates to anxiety regarding intimacy, not only sex. I wouldn't jump to diagnose yourself with Schizoid Personality without a lot more information. However, it sounds as if you are getting ready to engage in more interpersonal relationships, sexual and otherwise, and you would benefit from having a "coach" or therapist help you to negotiate new expereinces and feelings. You might ask around who is recommended as a psychotherapist for a young, maturing man who has had limited social experiences.

Good luck! -E. Seigle MD

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