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Forum Name: Psychiatric Topics

Question: I am scared about what i think


 volume - Tue Nov 18, 2008 11:04 am

I am 19 .For the last 5 years i have this thing..
So am at the point that when i see something i like ,or i would like to do something..speak to someone...(especially if i don't know him)..i imediately get negative thoughts(like i won't be able to focus to what the other person says)...and i also realise i am starting having negative thoughts.So i begin to feel tense,my chest tenses,i feel naxious,powerless,but i also realise that this are the consequnces of my negative thoughts, so i feel stressed about them because i can not control them. and because they have such a nasty effect..and i can not concentrate on what the other person is saying.
Thus thing begun when i thought about concentration and how we focus,,when talking and doing various activities.So i started thinking what if i can not concentrate..what would happen?i wouldn't be able to do anything well..so since then i have the feeling i can not concentrate on anything i need to..My mind just does the opposite...and this is what stresses me really bad.
By concentrating on something i mean to think how long i want only about that thing..My therapeut told me to relax ,close my eyes and imagine my self ..
I imediately got stressed..because this is concentrating issue..When i try to imagine my self i don't see me clearly..i see myself like i am black,or in the shadow and also i can only imagine me for an instance,next instance it goes away and i get stressed because i want to focus and i realise that i can't .
I can not think on something continuosly,for example..i have to solve a math problem..(i am student) i used to think at the problem continuosly for atleats 15 minutes..but now i distract my mind intentionally and i can not stop distracting it..this is what stresses me...my thinking is fragmented by distractions..that;s what i hate..Or when i talk to someone..(i used to pay attention to what someone said..now if i want to pay attention i imdeiatley get stressed..very stressed and
i distract my mind so i can not pay attention..and i can not stop it)But if i forgot about my problem i can pay attention...and very good
I feel i distract myself intentionally but at the same time i can not stop it..and it really stresses me.
I must say that am not retarded..i am at college (computer science).
What do you think is the problem?
should i change my thinking pattern?
I think it is a thinking problem..
 Dr. K. Eisele - Wed Nov 19, 2008 12:07 am

User avatar Dear Volume:

I agree that you have a "thinking" problem. Your mind does have the ability to concentrate because when you forget about your problem, you do concentrate very well. If your mind can concentrate at a particular time, then it can also concentrate at any other time, as long as your thought processes don't interrupt continuously with worries. It sounds as if you are so worried about not being able to concentrate that you distract yourself so you don't have to find out that you're right and you can't concentrate. However, the opposite is true--when you stop thinking about it you do concentrate.

Try reassuring yourself daily, as many times as you can manage without it interfering with work, school, relationships, etc., that you can concentrate very well. Poor self-esteem is often overcome by positive self-talk.

Good luck to you.
 volume - Wed Nov 19, 2008 3:55 am

i distract my thinking process intentionally,as if want to not be able to concentrate,this is very annoying,.I am also confused,i don't know what i like anymore..and it iterferes with my life...i feel stressed,feel noxious,no energy especially when i have to talk to someone unknown or have to speak in public..

i have this problem for 5 years.i just think that medication won't change my thinking process so i probably don't need it because some doctors said i have anxiety,ocd .

i am not optimistic about reassuring..i tried it and it made me more stressed..
I wish i never thought about concentration.
I didn't understand what you said here: "It sounds as if you are so worried about not being able to concentrate that you distract yourself so you don't have to find out that you're right and you can't concentrate."
 Dr. K. Eisele - Thu Nov 20, 2008 2:12 am

User avatar Dear Volume:

What I meant was that you may be so frightened, in those moments, that you will not be able to concentrate that you cause yourself to no be able to do so, just so that you don't test yourself fully.

Think about this: what if in a moment of anxiety, your fear of not being able to concentrate comes up, and you really tried hard to concentrate? If you were unable to concentrate, would it not be an emotionally painful moment? We have ways of protecting our emotional selves from severe disappointment by causing certain things to happen subconsciously.

I don't necessarily think you need medicine. I do think you need a therapist. I agree that your symptoms sound something like OCD.

Good luck.
 volume - Thu Nov 20, 2008 12:39 pm

I didn't thought it this way,but i feel i intentionally distract my thinking process so i would not be able to concentrate because it makes me more stressed and scared...(distracting).It seems that i must not be able to cocentrate and enjoy my life...that i should feel stressed,noxious (this is the feeling i have).
So in a moment of anxiety when i am afraid i can't concentrate i can 't help myself distracting my mind so i couldnt concentrate..
 volume - Mon Nov 24, 2008 7:48 am

Dr. K. Eisele wrote:Dear Volume:

What I meant was that you may be so frightened, in those moments, that you will not be able to concentrate that you cause yourself to no be able to do so, just so that you don't test yourself fully.

Think about this: what if in a moment of anxiety, your fear of not being able to concentrate comes up, and you really tried hard to concentrate? If you were unable to concentrate, would it not be an emotionally painful moment? We have ways of protecting our emotional selves from severe disappointment by causing certain things to happen subconsciously.

I don't necessarily think you need medicine. I do think you need a therapist. I agree that your symptoms sound something like OCD.

Good luck.

So when i am am very stressed i have to speak to someone unknown..i am stressed because i think i will not concetrate and i have the feeling that everything should be against me..that i should not concentrate..like i did something bad. i get the impression i will not be able to speak to that person,that i won't get through this experience and somehow i manage to get through this but when i think afterwards how i managed to do it i just don't know how..maybe my subconscious takes over and does't want me to remember ..
I hear some voices of persons i know that tell me("you can't do that...you will not make it..you wish!,youre too stupid..hahah look what he is trying to do..this is not right..you really are a jerk")so i start worrying especially about concentration because this is the most important thing for me...and i distract my thinking and also i just can not think of anything...maybe my subconscious try to prevent me to think as you said..
This voices really bodders me...like a pain...probably because of thme i worry so much about concentration..
I hope my therapist knows how to approach me and this problem

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