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Date of last update: 10/16/2017.

Forum Name: Male Sexual Disorders

Question: Major frustration !!!

 Ballli - Tue Jun 29, 2004 11:12 am

I'm a 31 year old male, 6'4", 190, in good shape, smoke 10-12 cigarettes a day, rarely drink. My girlfriend and I have recently started having sex. It has hurt our relationship more than anything ! She is 5'6", 115, petite. We're frustrated beyond all belief b/c we cannot engage in extended foreplay at all before sex. I will get fully erect when we begin, but when we 'play' I loose some of this. She has no problem getting me back to the point where I can achieve penetration, as long as I don't have a condom on. This means that once I am fully erect it is like a race to get the condom on and penetrate. It limits the positions we can try b/c of this time factor. About 1/3 of the time we end up loosing the race and I cannot penetrate her at all. I'm still erect, I'm just not fully erect ... with her small frame and body construction I need to be very 'hard' for us to get anywhere. Quickies are fine for us, some of the best sex that either of us have ever had, but we cant prolong it ... she thinks that I am not that attracted to her, which is totally not true ... I just feel like an idiot.
This has never happened to her or myself before. She has been with men larger than I am and it works fine. Personally, I have never had a problem like this before, thinking back on it though I don't believe that I have ever had to be fully erect to acieve penetration before. I will become that way as sex progresses and I get that stimulation, but I don't think I have had to start off that way. Another thing, I am allergic to her cats and take allergy meds before I go to her house, could this have anything to do with it?
This is really hurting our relationship, she really doesnt think I am attracted to her and I know she still belives it no matter what I say or do ! Is there any help for me? Something we are missing? Soemone told me Viagra, I'm 31 !!! I have no problem getting excited, it's just really hard for me to stay fully erect to achieve penetration as we put on the condom, then the condom tones down everything so much that we have to REALLY work to get going again. It's a freakin nightmare, great relationship being hurt by sex !!! UGH !
 Dr. Tamer Fouad - Sun Jul 04, 2004 6:36 am

User avatar Balli,
Your frustration is well founded. Please take a look at our erectile dysfunction page to get a clearer picture of what's happening. Then if you have any questions add them here.
Impotence (erectile dysfunction)


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