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Date of last update: 10/16/2017.

Forum Name: Male Sexual Disorders

Question: 21/Male Inability to orgasm with girlfriend please help.

 oisa - Wed May 02, 2007 1:04 am

I am a 21 year old male in good health. For some reason i have been unable to orgasm with my girlfriend through either oral sex or mutual masterbation. I have no problem achieving orgasm through personal masterbation. With my girlfriend I come very close to orgasm but cannot seem to achieve it even after 1.5 hours of stimulation.

i am very attracted to her and become aroused quite easily.
I masterbate the conventional way, however it is sometimes vigourous. I do feel somewhat anxious/nervous about climaxing for the first time with my girlfriend, and feel pressure to do so from her.
We have been together off and on for about 1 year and have only recently engaged in any activity that would lead to my orgasm. In that 1 year our relationship has seen emotional ups and downs.

I occasionally view pornography while masterbating but it is not necessary for me to become aroused and achieve orgasm on my own.

When masterbating by myself I can usually acheive orgasm in around 15 minutes.

In the past, I was unable to achieve orgasm with a different girlfriend for quite some time. Eventually i did achieve orgasm and had no problems thereafter.

Is my inability to orgasm the result of my nerves/ pressure to achieve orgasm? or a result of regular masterbation? or something else entirely perhaps?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
 Dr. Chan Lowe - Wed May 02, 2007 1:08 am

User avatar I suspect that your difficulty is, indeed, arising from anxiety as you describe. It is quite impressive what even a little anxiety can do to the body.

My best advice is to talk openly with your partner and discuss ways to help remove the pressure and anxiety. Often, once the pressure to climax is removed the issues resolve.

Best wishes.

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