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Date of last update: 10/16/2017.

Forum Name: Male Sexual Disorders

Question: Not able to last in sex

 mac1970 - Fri Nov 14, 2008 3:06 pm

I am a 38 year old married man. I have been sexually active for about 20 years - 15 with intercourse and 5 with "fooling around".

I am bothered by the fact that I have a very difficult time "lasting" when intercourse begins. We start and then I have to rest or sometimes my wife has to do all the "work". She says it does not bother her, but it bothers me.

I would like to know if there are any techniques or natural supplements that would help in this area.
 John Kenyon, CNA - Sat Nov 29, 2008 10:51 pm

User avatar Hi there -

I'm not certain, from your post, whether your inability to "last" means you suffer from premature ejaculation or if you suffer from premature fatigue during sex. If it's the former there are techniques for prolonging one's staying power, up to a point. If the problem is the latter (fatigue), however, there could be many reasons for it. some potentially serious. It could also be because you are able to "last" too long, and tire before you're able to reach climax. If you could please clarify this for me, I may be able to make some helpful suggestions.

I'll be waiting to hear back from you.
 mac1970 - Mon Dec 01, 2008 3:45 pm

Thank you for your reply. If I am understanding you correctly, you want to know if I "physically" tire out. The answer to that is no. My problem is, I am not able to "last" in intercourse for more than a couple of minutes (or less) before I ejaculate.

During foreplay I am alright and during other sexual acts (oral, hand) I can last longer, but not in the actual act.

I thought this would get better as I have gotten older and more "experience" but in my opinion it has not.
 John Kenyon, CNA - Tue Dec 02, 2008 1:31 pm

User avatar OK, I've got the idea now. Thanks for the clarification. This is unusual, that it should show up later in adulthood, although it's quite often a problem in younger men. There are definitely techniques and therapies for this sort of thing, although I don't feel qualified to advise you directly on this for a variety of reasons, including the fact that first one needs to determine whether there is a physical cause (sometimes it is associated with erectile dysfunction or other physical issues, although that doesn't sound like you). I can provide you with a link to another site which has covered this issue fairly well and is a respected one as well. Maybe from this you can either find a path to self-help or determine if you require some medical attention to the problem -- or, perhaps, that it isn't really a problem so much as a perception. At any rate, the Mayo Clinic covers it very well here: ... on/DS00578

While I don't normally refer to other medical sites, the Mayo one is a very highly regarded, general information site, so I think this may be of help to you. Best of luck to you with this, and please follow up with us as needed.

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