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Date of last update: 8/24/2017.

Forum Name: Psychiatric Topics

Question: Is this abuse?

 lalarisso - Thu Dec 01, 2005 3:23 am

My husband who I've known for 6 years, married for 1 year gets in a mood every few months where he is cruel verbally, and will do things to purposely make me very upset. He will say a word or comment and repeat it loudly over and over and over until I can't take it anymore and I lose it I throw something at him or hit him, I'm not very big and I don't hurt him and I am not a violent person, never have been. He then feels it's justified that he hit and throw me around. He says it shouldn't bother me, but knowing that it does bother me, why would he even start? This isn't for a few minutes it can go on for a good hour. I don't understand why he does it. He will act like this for a day or two and then everything is ok as far as he is concerned. while I am trying to remember why I married him, this alter ego is not my husband. But it killing my love. please help me. He tells I need help for my violent behavior. do I ?
 northerngirl - Fri Dec 02, 2005 12:17 am

Hi lalarisso<

I am not a psychiatrist, but I know for certain that violence in never acceptable. There is no way for your husband to justify being violent. You should definitely try to control your reactions to his provocations, but he is obviously trying to irritate you in an effort to justify his own violent actions. Again, I am not a medical I can do is advise you that this behavior pattern is not healthy and he needs some help. It is not good for your self esteem to stay in an abusive situation either.

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