Medical Specialty >> Psychiatry

Doctors Lounge - Psychiatry Answers

Back to Psychiatry Answers List

If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately. Doctors Lounge ( does not recommend or endorse any specific tests, physicians, products, procedures, opinions, or other information that may be mentioned on the Site.

DISCLAIMER: The information provided on is designed to support, not replace, the relationship that exists between a patient/site visitor and his/her physician. Please read our 'Terms and Conditions of Use' carefully before using this site.

Date of last update: 8/24/2017.

Forum Name: Psychiatric Topics

Question: Abnormal social life - general anxiety

 heartnsoul - Sun Oct 21, 2007 11:16 am

I am a 21 yr old female who has had social problems my entire life. When I was a child I was painfully shy and even feared speaking to family members. If called upon in class i would become rigid and be unable to speak from fear. I had few friends and was constantly afarid I wasn't good enough for them. Over time I have learned to deal with some of my fears so that I can live a somewhat normal like. I work in retail and attend night school but find that my phobia gets in the way of enjoying my work and keeps me from succeeding. My biggest problem is that I have almost no social interactions anymore. I only have a few casual aquantances at work. No friends, no boyfriend and only my mother to talk to, and although she tries it doesn't seem like she understands me. I feel like I have never been emotionally, spiritally, or physsiaclly close to anybody. This make me very depressed and I am often extremely lonly. I cry alot when I think about how different I am from others my age. I get frustrated because I know I have alot to offer people but I hold myself back. I feel like it is too late to learn how to socialize and worry that I will be alone forever. I don't think I am capable of having an intimate or sexual relationship with anybody and I don't try because I'm afrid that I am too inexperienced.I have been on a couple dates but have never even kissed a man.I am an attractive and pleasant person so that people often try and reach out to me, but I reject them because of my fears.I avoid intimate relationships at all cost, not just romantic. I started taking Paxil three months ago and have noticed some slight improvments in my general anxiety, like talking in public and meeting new people. But i still have an intense fear of intimate relationships. Do I have social anxiety or is it something worse? I just want to be normal and happy.Please give me any advise you can. I don't think I can live like this for another 50+ years.
 heartnsoul - Sat Oct 27, 2007 8:40 pm

Wow. I must be hopeless. I guess I'll just go stick my head in an oven.
 Dr. K. Eisele - Sun Oct 28, 2007 8:13 pm

User avatar Dear heartnsoul:

Don't stick your head in the oven! I was just busy. I am back, though, and ready to offer an explanation.

I think you might have Social Phobia. Paroxetine (Paxil) is one treatment for it. Another thing that you would find invaluable, I think, is some counseling (psychotherapy).

Don't worry, Social Phobia and other anxiety disorders are very treatable. There is no reason to fear that you might spend the rest of your life like this.

Best wishes.

| Check a doctor's response to similar questions

Are you a Doctor, Pharmacist, PA or a Nurse?

Join the Doctors Lounge online medical community

  • Editorial activities: Publish, peer review, edit online articles.

  • Ask a Doctor Teams: Respond to patient questions and discuss challenging presentations with other members.

Doctors Lounge Membership Application

Tools & Services: Follow DoctorsLounge on Twitter Follow us on Twitter | RSS News | Newsletter | Contact us