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Date of last update: 8/24/2017.

Forum Name: Psychiatric Topics

Question: Help Me From Parent Sex Haunting


 goodboy91 - Tue Jun 22, 2010 3:38 pm

Sir,
I am an 18 year old boy. My father is working in a far away place for last 7 years and comes home only once or twice in an year. My mom is staying with me. My mom and dad are still having a deep love and strong relationship between them.
Once my dad is home, we all are sleeping in a single room because we don't have another room that is suitable for sleeping. All we having is a common room, kitchen and a bathroom. Also our room will get enough light from outside even at the night so that everything in the room can be clearly seen. Due to their deep love and long gap after meeting each other, My parents use to have sex everytime they are together, but only at night during my sleep.
My problem is that I often witness them having sex with each other. They involve in sex thinking that I am asleep, but I will somehow be awake while they have. I also don't feel like interrupting their 'love-making' because once, when I was about 13,shile they were having sex, I woke up and asked them what they are doing. That made them feel upset and they had some kind of difficulty in facing me for a few days and that made me also sad. I have been experiencing this problem for about last 5 years. At first, I was afraid to know that they were involving in sex, but later on, I feel like I am getting addicted to see my parents' sex. Since they are so intimate and love each other really well, they use to have hardcore sex methods like oral, fingering, anal, etc. These acts attracts me more and more to observe what they are doing. I am pretty sure that they will do the same during the coming times too.
Now a days, these incidents are running through my mind which even leads me to masturbate thinking about my parents' sexual scenes.

I am feeling that it is really a big sin. But the situation doesn't allow me to get rid of it. I don't want to interrupt my parents and create a communication gap between them and me. Also I don't have another room to stay by getting rid of this.

Please help me in this matter.
 Faye Lang, RN, MSW - Fri Jul 02, 2010 8:09 pm

Hello, goodboy91,

What a difficult situation for you to be in. In many cultures, sexual activity in a common room is the norm, and others learn to ignore it. You are in a very vulnerable developmental stage, however, and that is partly why it is so difficult for you. Your culture is one of privacy, which is another reason it's difficult. However, you are 18, and therefore an adult. This means that you can talk with your parents and tell them exactly what you have written to us, and ask them to help you deal with the situation. Talking with them will not create a communication gap - there already is one, or you would have discussed it by now. Is your kitchen separate from the common room? If so, take your mattress and put it there while your father is home. Do you have a friend you can stay with at night while your father is home? Or a relative? Perhaps your parents will have an idea of what to do, if you discuss it with them as an adult. You have no reason at all to feel ashamed or wrong. It's normal to be interested in sex, and of course you are interested in watching. Do you have a pastor? Consult him or her. Do you have a doctor? Consult him or her. This is not your problem; it is a family problem.

Good luck to you.

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