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Date of last update: 8/24/2017.

Forum Name: Psychiatric Topics

Question: My fiance has delusions and I don't know what to do.

 jvolks11 - Fri Jul 02, 2010 8:01 am

My fiance has recently began talking about how in another world she was a famous singer and how she feels that she is in a dream right now and this dream is a punishment for something she did in another world. She said she was punished for writing a certain song when she was 17/18 and even gave herself a different first name for the other world. It scares me and I'm not sure what to do. Lately, it seems to happen mostly at night when she can't sleep.

In the past, she has had some severe temper tantrums where she will say hurtful things to me, talk to herself(I can here her telling herself to calm down), claim she is not herself but someone or something else and she has started to become unsocial, thinking that nobody is like her and therefore has a real problem making friends or making friendships last. Her moods seem to change on a daily basis. She can be funloving and carefree one day, and then depressed and quiet the next day. She has told me that she went to doctors when she was in high school (she is now 24). They had tried her on several medications for bipolar, depression, and anxiety. Currently, she is prescribed to adderal and wellebutrin for anxiety. There are times when she goes into a state of depression. She doesn't like going outside of the house (doesn't work right now) and most of the time, she just lays in bed.

She has told me some things that have happened in her past such as a sexual encounter when she was a little girl with an older boy in the neighborhood and seeing her father hold a gun up to himself. She has told me that her father switches moods constantly as well. I don't know all of her past experiences because she won't tell me everything. All she says to me is that she's done some terrible things before i met her and she can't tell me about them.

She talks about the urge to do "bad" things and how "someone" will tell her to do these things. This someone will only leave her alone if she does the things she is being told to do.

I'm really confused, and I'm not sure what to do. She refuses to go to any doctors and won't tell anyone about these things besides me for fear of being "put away." Please help me in anyway you can. Thanks.
 Faye Lang, RN, MSW - Mon Jul 12, 2010 4:25 pm

Hello, jvolks11,

I'm very sorry to hear of your fiancee's difficulties. Her symptoms suggest a thought disorder in nature, but that can only be determined by evaluation by a psychologist or psychiatrist. In any case, they are severely impacting her life and have become disabling. If she is able to voluntarily seek assistance now, it likely would not result in being "put away" - or hospitalized for treatment. However, if she is unable to accept assistance, there is the risk that if her symptoms increase in severity, the need for an involuntary hospitalization could occur. Outpatient assistance can be found at the local public mental health agency, including both psychiatric and psychological treatment. A thorough evaluation can result in successful outpatient treatment. The loved ones in such situations can become frustrated and even depressed due to their own inability to do anything but encourage the person having difficulties. It's helpful to seek assistance on their own, to help strengthen their own knowledge about the condition and their coping abilities. I realize this information is not very specific, but I hope it is helpful to you. Good luck.

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