Doctors Lounge - Psychiatry Answers
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Forum Name: Psychiatric Topics
Question: I want a girl, not a boy
|Tarantulo - Sun Aug 14, 2005 12:36 pm|
Hy everyone. I'm 25.years old male from London,UK.Reason why I'm writting here is because I can't solve the problem myself but I'd love to hear thoughts of others.Since my 18th birthday I have lived with a guy 15 years older than me.At first,we had sex but it lasted for a few months as I told him that 'I just don't like this any more'. Since then we have a 'platonic' love, friendship without sex.Don't get me wrong, he's cool guy,very nice,kindly,spiritualy&healty life oriented person ready to help everyone in trouble.I trully love him but only as a best friend.I know that he loves me more than just a friend althought his words are quiet.When I came into a sexual relationship with him I was a virgin and never had a girlfriend before.That was a desire from my childhood (to have a girlfriend) which over the time became an obsession that seem, will never end.If I try to have a woman friend he would be very jelaous and made an argument.I have to leave him but it's hard.I forgot to mention that he's bisexual but I'm hetero and reason why am with him is because I don't want to hurt his feelings.Do I have to suddenly leave him without a word of farewell?
|Fran01 - Mon Aug 15, 2005 6:38 am|
Hi Michael, I think at the end of the day you have allready answered your question yourself. Have you felt attracted to any other guys before.. Maybe guys who are the same age? Even if you do, you clearly don't want to be with this guy. You will hurt him maybe, but in the long run it will be better for him and yo. If your heart is not in it, you are wasting your time and his. look he is turning 40, and time is running out for him.. Give him the chance to find a life partner, break the ties in a nice way, no need to just stop contact. Explain to him that you are considering his feelings. Good luck
|PakMan1618 - Tue Sep 20, 2005 9:57 pm|
I agree. Talk to him personally. Tell him the truth, he will understand. You can also "try" to find loopholes such as finding him another person to love, or treat him badly into breaking up. But those arent considered moral haha. Just talk to him. If your a true friend you can do it easy 1-2-3. PRACTICE what ur gunna say sorta
|DeLWolcott - Tue Sep 20, 2005 10:07 pm|
Tell him as much concerning your true feelings as you are able. If a person truly loves another, they will respect their wishes and decisions even if they don't understand - or if it hurts.
Good luck and best wishes!
|PakMan1618 - Tue Sep 20, 2005 10:40 pm|
just talk to relationship experts or councilors
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